Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
