I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize