It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
