Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Its about making memories worth repressing
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
