ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
