You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Randomize
