There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
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