What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize