Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Randomize
