drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
