Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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