I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
