The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
