Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize