of course. lets lasso hookers.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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