I am puke
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
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