Dual....:-)
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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