he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
