How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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