Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
