Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
