dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
