and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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