Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
