Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize