i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
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