This is not my ceiling
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
