windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
