mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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