If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
