My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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