I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Randomize