the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
