Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
