is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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