My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
