Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Randomize
