someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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