is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
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