Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize