Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
