First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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