sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
