i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Randomize
