I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
