Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
