I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
