maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
