Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
