Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
